Reactions To Tory Lanez’s Crime Is A Relationship Health Indicator

In life, we use various things to indicate the state of something else. For example, in economics, the Big Mac Index notes purchasing power parity using the price of a McDonald’s Big Mac as its benchmark. In Black families, we know the quality of someone’s dish at the cookout based on how quickly it finishes or how much is left over. Indicators, do you get it?

In relationships, we’ve come to call certain behaviors red or green flags. While it’s easy for some of us to pretend a flag is a different color than it actually is, that is unsafe. How people react to political or social issues is not often the easiest indicator of whether or not a relationship should persist. Given how polarizing such issues can be, forgoing a person’s reaction to socio-political issues in the name of your love is somewhat understandable. However, understandable as it may be, it is not wise.

Socio-political events that should matter in your relationships

For example, when Roe v Wade was overturned, what was your partner’s reaction? When Donald Trump was elected, how did your partner feel? When Rudy Giuliani’s mug shot dropped, did your partner plan to buy a t-shirt with it? All of these questions are indicators.

The most polarizing event of the past few years has been about Megan Thee Stallion being shot – and by whom. It seems odd to me that a victim of a crime identifying her assailant would be so polarizing an issue, but alas, this is Black womanhood. Nevertheless, now that Tory Lanez has been found guilty and sentenced to 10 years in jail, your partner’s reaction to this news is definitely an indicator of the health of your relationship.

Tory Lanez is not the victim, Megan is

Tory Lanez shot a human being, someone who trusted him, then proceeded to harass and intimidate his victim. If your partner feels sympathetic towards Tory, you should ask yourself if he would hope for similar sympathy in the future. Or perhaps your partner believes that a Black man is being unfairly persecuted. It’s unfair to believe that a Black woman, who initially sought to protect Tory Lanez from the threat of being shot by LAPD, couldn’t clearly identify her own abuser. If your partner believes that 10 years is too long a sentence, ask them how much a human life is worth in their opinion.

At the same time, it’s understandable that you’d believe your love is worth more than their socio-political opinions. There is so little love going around in the world. So many people are lonely, especially in the wake of the COVID-19 lockdown, I get it. But carrying on with a partner who could see Tory Lanez as “an innocent Black man being unfairly persecuted” instead of a man who willfully shot his friend and later denied it, is not the person to spend life with.