when black men speak out against sexual abuse: race, sex, and coming of age

By Zahida Sherman*, AFROPUNK Contributor

Two weeks ago, I wrote about the horrors of advising students who are victims and perpetrators of sexual assault. I was frustrated that sexual assault is a tragic coming of age experience for Black women—and Black men— and that the sexual traumas that I experienced growing up are the same nightmares that my students have to wrestle with. I also wrote about the great responsibility I feel as a college administrator tasked with guiding Black students through their academic, professional, and personal journeys through an institution and society that was designed for their failure.

In the midst of developing student programming and pouring through dozens of brilliant articles on sexual assault and gender, I realized something: Black male silence on these issues has been deafening. Too often, Black women lead the conversations, write the articles, organize the marches, start the hashtags, and develop strategies to combat the attack on our bodies and sexualities. Too often, we are tasked with protecting ourselves from our brothers, classmates, bosses, coworkers, and from a society.

I began to wonder, as I often have, what would happen if men led the conversations on why so many men rape and sexually assault women? What if men facilitated the discussion on how it’s possible that we find ourselves inundated by sexual predators in the news headlines every day? What if men used their power and influence to talk sense to other men and boys, who have been socialized to discredit the voices of women and girls, who have been led to believe that Black female bodies are a necessary casualty of their personal quest for manhood, and who have been led to believe that calling out sexism equates to social and racial death?

So I started searching for those Black male voices. And let me tell you, finding them was more difficult than I imagined. What follows, in no special order, is what I think are some of the most honest musings on Black masculinity and sexual assault, by Black men, for Black men. This list is in no way exhaustive or definitive—in fact, this content is very cisgender and heteronormative— but it’s a start.  And while I still don’t have all the answers on how to free ourselves from this cycle of abuse, I know that our men and boys have central roles to play in sexual assault prevention and our coming of age.

“Man Up,” by Deandre Levy, Linebacker, Detroit Lions

“Charlamagne Finally Realizes Men Have Been Raised on Rape Culture,” Charlamagne the God, radio host and media personality

“Straight Black Men Are the White People of Black People,” Damon Young, Editor-in-Chief of Very Smart Brothas and a columnist for GQ.com

“How, if You’re a Man, to Deal With the Fact That You’re Probably Trash,” Damon Young, Editor-in-Chief of Very Smart Brothas and a columnist for GQ.com

“Terry Crews: Manhood, Feminism & the Mindset that Leads to Rape,” interview by Elamin Abdelmahmoud, social media editor for Buzzfeed
Highlights on consent and sexual assault: 9:50

“A Call to Men,” Tony Porter, educator and activist

Honorable Ally Mention:

“Violence Against Women: It’s a Men’s Issue,” Jackson Katz, PhD., educator and author
This is, hands down, THE BEST video of a man breaking down why men should be at the center of conversations of assault.

*Zahida is a proud Seattle native and diversity and inclusion professional who enjoys writing about Black culture, gender, and adulthood. She works at the University of the Pacific.